Why Do We Always Ask, “What Is Love?”
“Loving someone or be with someone is a very active process. Love is not just a feeling that you have; it is supposed to accumulate to the benefit of the loved one.”
One of the most generally asked questions and one that many people have thousands of answers. No one can really define it. Many have tried to describe it based on their feelings what they experience, but we need to tell the all of you that: Love is not a feeling. Love is a decision that we make.
The ancient Greeks used seven words to define the different states of love we can experience:
Storage: natural affection
Eros: sexual and erotica
Agape: unconditional, divine love
Pragma: committed, married love
Philautia: self love
Love is one of the most thoughtful emotions we experience as humans in out life. It’s bigger than us, meaning, though we can attract it in our lives, we do not have the control over how, when and where love starts to express itself. Maybe that’s why 72% of people believe in their love at first sight. Sometimes, truly love does strike like a bolt of lightening to the chest, and you aren’t prepared for it.
Whenever we ask, “What is love?” it is the most important part because we are insecure if someone really loves us, or because a special someone who is positive just blamed us of not really loving them.
Love, is a different feeling, do not come and go; love stays and commits itself to one person through the good and through the bad. Without any commitment, love stops to exist. A commitment filled love is what differentiates relationships that fall apart when times get a bit rough with the relationships that continue to strive even when life turns them upside down. Many of us having a beliefs about love and romance which actually avoid us from making intelligent choices when it comes to love. Love myths, we call it. Let’s take a look at the three deadliest ones and set it straight.
When we are truly committed in giving and taking love, we don’t consider such logical questions. It’s only when something is incomplete that we begin to examine and plan what that thing actually is. For example, no one sits down to take a full meal and asks, “What is a pastrami sandwich?”
It’s only when something is incomplete that we begin to consider and plan what that thing actually is. So, if we’re asking the question, “What is love?” it simply means that we don’t feel to be completely loved, or that someone doesn’t feel completely loved by us.
But since we’re asking, let’s try to answer the question.
Myth #1 – True romantic love conquers all.
As long as you’re in love, you can get through anything in life. Having this belief prevents you from dealing with real relationship problems. You will end up drubbing yourself up emotionally whenever things do turn goes bad as you depend everything on this ‘feeling’ of love you have towards your partner.
Truth: Romance is not enough to make a relationship keep working. What will get you through the tough times are unity and assurance that you both share together. A good support and strength will make a marriage last forever. Romance is simply the icing on the cake that is already extremely delicious.
Myth #2 – You’ll know true love at first sight.
True love doesn’t happen in an instant. It is infatuation that hits you at first sight. Be careful. Confusing obsession for true love can make you ignore the rest of the relationship. Not only that, you may also miss the chance for the real and lasting love.
Truth: True love always happens after time has been passed, after you have seen the good parts and the not so good parts about your partner and vice versa. It takes just a moment to experience obsession or lust, but true love takes time. That is what makes love so much more special and rare from others, it simply does not happen that quickly.
Myth #3 – The perfect partner will fulfill you completely.
You need to be in a relationship in order to be happy and fulfilled within yourself. You need someone to fill a void within you and that person will be your perfect partner. There are two major dangerous things about this belief, is the fact that there is a ‘perfect’ partner and the fact that someone else can ‘complete’ you.
Truth: Your partner may fulfill many of your needs, but certainly not all of them. No one is or should be held responsible for making you feel complete. If you really feel emotionally empty before you enter into any relationship, you will always feel just as empty once you are in it. Be always happy with yourself and who you are first and foremost, before you enter into any relationships.
Remember, that love is not a feeling you feel but it is a decision you make, which requires time and true commitment. So, now, let’s talk about you. Do you really love the person you are with? Does your relationship defy these myths? And do you now know if whether or not you love each other truthfully? There’s something to think about today.